davidchait: Yes, I’ve global’d everything properly, as can be seen by the fact it works when placed after the get_header() call. Something is destroying my global.
forceagainstsomething: I picked $INFO so that it wouldn’t clash with WordPress, but you’re right just the same. My functions use prefixes, though.
I really need this to be a drop-in solution, however, because it’s generic enough to work outside of WordPress, so a plugin is not the answer. Is there a function call somewhere that wipes globals or something?