Off Site Link Solution!?!?

I have just bored myself to tears reading all the opinions about “target=_blank”. I do not want this to be an argument about what is good or bad. I just want to do it this way or another suggested way that you post. Solutions only PLEASE!
What I want:

• All on site links to open in the same window.
• All off site links to open in a different window, default.
• On the off site new window a header (sorta like framed) with some controls (close header, close window, etc.) that would allow a user to control that window.
• All off site links then open in this one new window.
• Some way that would allow the user to choose how to treat off site links if default is not acceptable. Here there is some code that I have no idea where to put or how to get to work, that might be something of this sort.

I want to give the most flexibility without losing folks off my site due to an abundance of links. Anyone have this type of solution or another of comparable worth? I’m all ears for productive talk!