I run several multisites and understand the problem but I have no idea why it happens and, to me, it’s not much of an inconvenience to use the second list instead. So I’ve never worried about it much.
It would be nice if it was more consistent across the network.
But as long as you know the address it’s not a problem to visit the site and even get to the site’s dashboard by logging in.
So, unless and until someone comes along and fixes that broken feature, use the second list.
For those who haven’t got that far with a multisite yet…
Login as Network Admin –> Dashboard –> My Sites (for one way of seeing the list)
or
Login as Network Admin –> Dashboard –> My Sites –> Network Admin –> Sites (for a slightly different way of viewing that same list)
or for a multinetwork
Dashboard –> My Network Pick the network–> Sites –>
or else
Dashboard –> My Network Pick the network–> Network Admin –> Sites (for a slightly different way of viewing that same list)
That’s the best answer I can offer for now.