Ping Services

So I understand what ping is and how it works. But I’m still curious about how ping slows my site and how to fix it. If I’m correct, wordpress pings whenever I simply edit a post or whenever I post something new. Recently I’ve been looking for a plugin that works well and doesn’t kill my site.

I would like to simply improve the performance of my site, find a plugin that pings the urls I specify and is easy to use.

I found MaxBlogPress Ping Optimizer 2.2.3 but it doesn’t seem to be working well. Can anyone suggest another plugin?

I would like to know how everyone else is using their ping services? Through the traditional wordpress service or through a plugin they found?

Thanks.